You exit your office and survey the lot full of your construction equipment. Your steamroller? How awesome would it be to flatten Choi Soon-sil like a pancake using that? But you remember that scene from Austin Powers: way too slow to be practical. The cement mixer? A horrible way to go, but she would have to stay pretty still for you to pour the cement down her throat. A bulldozer likewise might not get the job done.

Then your eyes rest on your favourite excavator, its prehensile shovel glistening in the morning sun like Excalibur pulled out of the rock. That's the ticket. Sorry to wrest this one from your hands, reader -- but history has been written, as has the name of this Choose Your Broke Adventure story. You're taking that excavator. Tell you what though: I'll let you choose how to get it there, by loading it onto a flatbed truck or driving the motherfucking thing all the way from Sunchang, North Jeolla Province.

Hint: are you familiar with the original story? How did the real-life Excavator Vigilante get up to Seoul? And, was his attempt successful?

I'll drive my excavator straight to Seoul.

I'll drive it up to Seoul on the back of a truck.